clio smash

[jlh]

It may well be a personal failing, but there are two sure ways to make me so angry I can't see straight. The first is to laugh at me when I'm angry. I hate not being taken seriously; it makes me apoplectic.

The second is to condescend to me. It's (hopefully) the only time I become an intellectual snob. I am smart enough to keep up with anyone—and even if they take a left turn into their own specialty, I know how to ask the right questions. So when someone snidely implies that I "just don't get it", or pats my little head, or generally acts superior to me, I pretty much want to knock their block off. I have had an exchange with a fandomer in the past who was so condescending to me that I have never spoken to him again, and have nothing good to say about him now. (And yes, if you ask me, I'll tell you who.)

This may be why I can never live in England. I'd probably be furious 24 hours a day.

ETA: So this doesn't come across as being passive aggressive or going behind someone's back, I did confront the person who was condescending to me this evening directly, in a thread over at fandomsecrets. But they irritated me so much that I had to get out my leftover frustration lest I get grouchy all over poor Ali!

Comments

[ali-wildgoose.livejournal.com]

ARG

also: dude, that guy was a dick.

[honestys-easy.livejournal.com]

I saw all that; I think the OP really made that secret just so they can jump on anyone that commented to it. Fail.

And I was so confused by the extreme dry humor everyone had in England; I didn't ever know if they were being sincere or were all snickering behind my back. Even the way they say "Bye" on the telephone made me feel insecure, lol.

[jlh.livejournal.com]

The OP wanted to know why I commented on the secret if I wasn't in the fandom. It was all so absurd. I think they did make it so they could sit back and feel superior. Pisses me right off.

A lot of my HP pals are Brits, and it seems that their fallback argumentative position is "you disagree with me because you are less intelligent than I am" and I really can't stand that at all. It's like condescension is a way of life over there, unfortunately.

But when I was in England I was mostly worried because everyone seemed to think I was loud, so I was having a huge class freakout.

[sistermagpie.livejournal.com]

Oh yes, the secret that's worded so that any objective person would read it the way you did, but it turns out it's a trap. Anybody who comments is obviously falling for it!

It's like that other poster from yesterday who described anybody who commented a certain way on a secret as "getting hysterical" or whatever.

Yeah, how defensive and silly of you to point out that everything the person said about you was wrong.

Of course now I am totally curious about the first guy too, the one you don't speak to!

[jlh.livejournal.com]

I think that the people within the fandom would get it, and the people outside wouldn't, and as I pointed out, most of the people on f!s aren't in their stupid fandom. That's the WHOLE POINT of f!s. Moron.

haha, I go back and forth between writing it here and telling you in person, not that I think anyone would read this here as I'm not exactly the crossroads of fandom.

[sistermagpie.livejournal.com]

Feel free to tell me in person! I always feel weird about having things in writing if it's something that people could have reactions to...

[sisterpandora.livejournal.com]

I think I remember who the prick from the past is so I won't ask, at least, right this minute.

And I'm sorry someone has been an ill informed assmonkey to you today. I'm quite certain your brain could mop the floor with his all on its own.

[dana-kujan.livejournal.com]

I actually felt compelled to sift through all the comments until I found the thread. Ick. I have no doubt that person would not have engaged you in that manner had she/he been logged in. Typical, but I'm sorry you got sucker punched.

Honestly, F!S is so toxic, I don't bother with comments anymore. In fact, I'm down to trawling secrets for good images for icons and keeping count of all the "I think RPS is a mortal sin... but I ship Real Person #1 and Real Person #2" secrets. I save them to my Hypocrites folder. Perhaps, someday, I'll post them as a meta slide show.

[jlh.livejournal.com]

You know, most of the time, f!s is really really awesome. I love all the rarefandom stuff, and I love how most of what happens is "you're not alone!" I've argued with people on occasion, but never with someone that was so full of themselves. I really think they missed the point about what f!s is for, and mostly wanted to poke their fandom. I don't think f!s is the place to do that, because you get a lot of noise from the non-fandomers like me, and we'll all judge your fandom from the outside. And anyway a bunch of other people piled on them.

And of course I love all those secrets about how everyone secretly ships RPS. They're the best. Esp now with the Olympics and all.

[amyamy.livejournal.com]

Woe that people were being obnoxious to you. Went through to find your comments and, yeah, the original secret keeper was massively, massively full of him/herself.

The only point of my comment here is to go "Yay! Matt/Mohinder!" Once again I discover how very much I adore you and agree with 99.99% of things you say.

[jlh.livejournal.com]

Matt and Mohinder are completely adorable and I really hope that if they sex up the Mohinder they sex up the Matt.

I really hate it when people are like, "no, the reason you disagree with me is because you don't understand me." Ugh.

[lillijulianne.livejournal.com]

condescension...it sends me into a freakout. ugh.

where is the thread?

[jlh.livejournal.com]

The secret is #163. This (http://community.livejournal.com/fandomsecrets/192000.html?thread=77391104#t77391104) is the thread where they talked to me. This (http://community.livejournal.com/fandomsecrets/192000.html?thread=77360128#t77360128) is the thread where they talked to Ali and some other people, and said the things that in my thread I said they said "elsewhere".

[millefiori.livejournal.com]

Hmmm. I think that person's use of the word 'amused' tells me everything I need to know. For some reason I despise that; I think it's because it implies an 'I'm so above it all!' attitude, and the people who, you know, actually care about what's being discussed are just such sillies, etc.

I have the same rage-button reaction to *shrug* and variations thereof. It just always comes off as so rude and dismissive.

(Of course that probably says more about me than about those particular words! My issues, let me show you them!)

[jlh.livejournal.com]

Yeah, the amused was a total tell. I hate the idea that "caring" makes you weak. Whatever, person, you're not my yardstick.

I feel exactly the same about shrug! It's like nails on a chalkboard. Totally dismissive!