a meme and a plea
Jul. 27th, 2003 03:54 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jlhThose of you with siblings will remember this old standard from your parents: I don't care who started it, I'm finishing it.
I have my moments of bitchiness, hell, we ALL do. But honestly, I'm over it. My inclination when I hear someone is talking trash about me or about a friend is to say, I'm sure they are mistaken; I'm sure they don't actually mean it. I read whatever post etc. it may be with that thought in mind and try to reply to them to increase the general peace. Unfortunately, that really isn't working. And equally unfortunately, more than a few sets of my friends are fighting.
(And before you ask, no, I'm really not stupid enough to take sides in any of them. I think I've made it clear what I think in most of these instances, whether publicly or privately.)
Well you know? We're all adults here, or close to, and it really just shouldn't be like this. The fandom is becoming heavily unfun, and there is no reason for it. We are all here because we love some books. Of course we disagree on what we love about them, or what we think they mean, or what sort of fanfiction we want to read and write based on them. But does that mean we all get to be cunty to each other? Really, people, I expect a lot more from you. Especially you.
I'm not looking to make one of those "can't we all love each other" posts because you know what? We can't, and we won't. But what we can do, what we have to do, is be civil to each other. Don't automatically think that someone is doing something out of the worst motives possible. Steer clear of those you don't like, but don't demand that everyone you know choose sides. Ask your friends not to have proxy fights on your behalf, instead of sending out the troops. When you hear a rumour, consider the source.
I hope this isn't just another naive plea that flings out into the wilderness and is never heard again. Even if it is, well, at least I know I did my best.
And now, a meme from our sponsor. (In this case,![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
fick_l_rene)
Ten bands/people you have seen live (Like Rene, I'm skipping the indy bands I've seen in clubs.)
1. U2, three times: Joshua Tree in 87 at Boston Garden, Pop Mart at Giant Stadium, and the latest tour also in NYC
2. REM, twice, the Life's Rich Pageant tour and the Green tour
3. Bon Jovi opening for Ratt in 84
4. Duran Duran--my first concert in 83
5. Crowded House
6. Eric Clapton
7. Sting, twice, in 88 and 99
8. The Go-Go's
9. The first Lollapalooza tour, so Living Colour, Nine Inch Nails, Body Count, Rollins Band, Jane's Addiction
10. Every band my C has been in
Nine Things You're Looking Forward to:
1. The fandom fucking cutting it out already
2. Going back to school
3. Book 6
4. Prisoner of Azkaban, the movie
5. Starting my new fic
6. Rene and Cyg's proposed visits in September, cause Alex is here so I don't have to look forward to that.
7. My birthday, for once
8. Watching my friends become successful--in their own eyes, not the world's
9. Being a mom
Eight Things You Wear Daily:
1. Clothes
2. Moisturizer
3. A bra
4. deodorant
5. Contact lenses
6. shoes
7. Oceanus perfume
8. Lipstick or balm
Seven Things That Annoy You:
1. My father
2. My client
3. The heat
4. Traffic
5. That the Amish market never has the same stuff two days running
6. That all the guys in straight porn are ugly
7. That my apartment always seems to be so goddamned dusty
Six Things you touch every day:
1. My ibook
2. My stereo
3. My bathroom sink
4. My fridge
5. My curtains
6. My hair
Five people you'd like to spend more time with:
1. C, who lives in Boston
2. P, who lives in DC
3. D, who lives in LA
4. S, who lives here but I don't see her enough
5. My fellow e!vil pink ladiesely709, lunasparrow and evil_erato
Four Things you do every morning:
1. Brush teeth
2. Wash face
3. Listen to NPR (yes, weekends too)
4. Eat, usually eggs
Three Movies you could watch over and over:
1. The Philadelphia Story
2. It Happened One Night
3. Swing Time
Two of your favorite songs at the moment:
1. Destiny, by Zero 7, which I'm trying to learn
2. Over the Hills and Far Away, because I am obsessed with my Zeppelin boxed set suddenly. (Dancing Days, btw, is my ultimate H/Hr song.)
One person you could spend the rest of your life with:
1. C. I wouldn't know anything about love if it wasn't for him. We've spent nearly twenty years living out of each other's pockets and there is no reason to stop now. He's all the family I need.
I have my moments of bitchiness, hell, we ALL do. But honestly, I'm over it. My inclination when I hear someone is talking trash about me or about a friend is to say, I'm sure they are mistaken; I'm sure they don't actually mean it. I read whatever post etc. it may be with that thought in mind and try to reply to them to increase the general peace. Unfortunately, that really isn't working. And equally unfortunately, more than a few sets of my friends are fighting.
(And before you ask, no, I'm really not stupid enough to take sides in any of them. I think I've made it clear what I think in most of these instances, whether publicly or privately.)
Well you know? We're all adults here, or close to, and it really just shouldn't be like this. The fandom is becoming heavily unfun, and there is no reason for it. We are all here because we love some books. Of course we disagree on what we love about them, or what we think they mean, or what sort of fanfiction we want to read and write based on them. But does that mean we all get to be cunty to each other? Really, people, I expect a lot more from you. Especially you.
I'm not looking to make one of those "can't we all love each other" posts because you know what? We can't, and we won't. But what we can do, what we have to do, is be civil to each other. Don't automatically think that someone is doing something out of the worst motives possible. Steer clear of those you don't like, but don't demand that everyone you know choose sides. Ask your friends not to have proxy fights on your behalf, instead of sending out the troops. When you hear a rumour, consider the source.
I hope this isn't just another naive plea that flings out into the wilderness and is never heard again. Even if it is, well, at least I know I did my best.
And now, a meme from our sponsor. (In this case,
fick_l_rene)Ten bands/people you have seen live (Like Rene, I'm skipping the indy bands I've seen in clubs.)
1. U2, three times: Joshua Tree in 87 at Boston Garden, Pop Mart at Giant Stadium, and the latest tour also in NYC
2. REM, twice, the Life's Rich Pageant tour and the Green tour
3. Bon Jovi opening for Ratt in 84
4. Duran Duran--my first concert in 83
5. Crowded House
6. Eric Clapton
7. Sting, twice, in 88 and 99
8. The Go-Go's
9. The first Lollapalooza tour, so Living Colour, Nine Inch Nails, Body Count, Rollins Band, Jane's Addiction
10. Every band my C has been in
Nine Things You're Looking Forward to:
1. The fandom fucking cutting it out already
2. Going back to school
3. Book 6
4. Prisoner of Azkaban, the movie
5. Starting my new fic
6. Rene and Cyg's proposed visits in September, cause Alex is here so I don't have to look forward to that.
7. My birthday, for once
8. Watching my friends become successful--in their own eyes, not the world's
9. Being a mom
Eight Things You Wear Daily:
1. Clothes
2. Moisturizer
3. A bra
4. deodorant
5. Contact lenses
6. shoes
7. Oceanus perfume
8. Lipstick or balm
Seven Things That Annoy You:
1. My father
2. My client
3. The heat
4. Traffic
5. That the Amish market never has the same stuff two days running
6. That all the guys in straight porn are ugly
7. That my apartment always seems to be so goddamned dusty
Six Things you touch every day:
1. My ibook
2. My stereo
3. My bathroom sink
4. My fridge
5. My curtains
6. My hair
Five people you'd like to spend more time with:
1. C, who lives in Boston
2. P, who lives in DC
3. D, who lives in LA
4. S, who lives here but I don't see her enough
5. My fellow e!vil pink ladies
ely709, lunasparrow and evil_eratoFour Things you do every morning:
1. Brush teeth
2. Wash face
3. Listen to NPR (yes, weekends too)
4. Eat, usually eggs
Three Movies you could watch over and over:
1. The Philadelphia Story
2. It Happened One Night
3. Swing Time
Two of your favorite songs at the moment:
1. Destiny, by Zero 7, which I'm trying to learn
2. Over the Hills and Far Away, because I am obsessed with my Zeppelin boxed set suddenly. (Dancing Days, btw, is my ultimate H/Hr song.)
One person you could spend the rest of your life with:
1. C. I wouldn't know anything about love if it wasn't for him. We've spent nearly twenty years living out of each other's pockets and there is no reason to stop now. He's all the family I need.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2003-07-27 04:20 am (UTC)YEEEEEEES! :) L0ff you hon... what's happening now...? *wibbles* (Actually, wait. Don't answer that... Ignorance is bliss...)
~Jess
no subject
Date: 2003-07-27 05:54 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-07-31 10:37 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-07-27 07:27 am (UTC)Great meme BTW. :>
no subject
Date: 2003-07-27 05:45 pm (UTC)2. *hugs and takes for a drink*
no subject
Date: 2003-07-27 06:12 pm (UTC)This has been a rather trying week for a variety of reasons, and watching the drama unfold has been at the top of my list of things I never want to see again. I can only imagine what things were like at "home base", as it were. Hope you're starting to feel a bit better - am sending virtual warm fuzzies your way to cheer you up :)
Five people you'd like to spend more time with:
5. My fellow e!vil pink ladies ely709, lunasparrow and evil_erato
<3333 Right back at ya babe!
no subject
Date: 2003-07-28 04:10 am (UTC)