Old Flames Can't Hold a Candle to how grouchy Simon gets on country night

[jlh]

See, the problem with putting Simon on Moment of Truth is that Simon can't lie. Hour long show so no time for silliness although Ari and I amused ourselves thinking about tiny!Ryan, in glasses and headgear and pudge, admiring Vanna. (Did y'all see Ryan on Rewind this week, spastic in spectacles? How adorable was that?)

• Brooke, "Jolene." Thank god the hipster White Stripe version didn't raise it's ugly head. However, as Ari says, Brooke really shouldn't be smiling. This is a song of HEARTBREAK. And of course Simon agrees with us.
  
• D.Cook, "Little Sparrow." lillijulianne thinks Simon has a bird phobia. I really liked it a lot and I'm pleased he finally did his own arrangement.
  
• Ramiele, "Do I Ever Cross Your Mind." That was kinda boring. Why isn't she coming across?
  
• Jason, "Travellin' Through." I adore this song, and I thought he was his usual adorable self and did quite a good job on the song, actually.
  
• Carly, "Here You Come Again." I love the way she slowed it down, and I thought she sounded really fantastic.
  
• small David, "Smoky Mountain Memories." Well, it was very David, and Simon was right that the song choice was fantastic. It's nice to see him in good voice.
  
• Kristy, "Coat of Many Colors." She is so boring. Why are all these girls boring? Do they read the lyrics? I mean, seriously.
  
• Syesha, "I Will Always Love You." Well, someone had to sing it. Simon was right, and I think the problem was that she didn't have time in a minute and a half to mush those two versions of the song together, and should have stuck with Dolly. It suited her voice better, and she wouldn't have fallen into the Randy "don't sing like a diva" trap.
  
• Michael, "It's All Wrong, But It's All Right." Friends, I finally liked Michael! I always wanted to! But he was great! However, he was also wearing an ASCOT of two colors of PURPLE and a LEATHER BLAZER.

[Poll #1164444]

I voted for Carly, Jason, D. Cook, and Brooke.

Comments

[boniblithe.livejournal.com]

However, as Ari says, Brooke really shouldn't be smiling. This is a song of HEARTBREAK.

EXACTLY what I said.

[jlh.livejournal.com]

It's just like last week with Every Breath you take, and fine, getting that song wrong is legendary, but Jolene is pretty fucking straight forward. Why have a cry in your voice if you aren't crying?

[adjudicated.livejournal.com]

I thought Michael's ascot was reminiscent of Fred's neckerchief from Scooby Doo!

[jlh.livejournal.com]

Which makes Syesha Daphne, and Jason is totallyShaggy, but who's Velma?

[evil-erato.livejournal.com]

My past is coming back to haunt me tonight. I just got done confessing my girlhood love of the Mandrell girls on Carrie's LJ, and here you are with one of them in your poll. I fear my dreams tonight. :))

[jlh.livejournal.com]

We were talking—I was demanding variety shows from Carrie for that joke. My favorite was Louise of course. I loved how Barbara always wore a dress with two sleeves, Louise one sleeve, and Irlene was sleeveless.

[evil-erato.livejournal.com]

You sure about that (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZL8F22-mMdI&feature=related)? ;)

Man, my morning is being spent watching old country things on YouTube. Work what?

[locumtenens.livejournal.com]

Brooke: Janice from the Muppet Show

This made me all giggly. Nail, meet head.

[jlh.livejournal.com]

I should know; I won a miniature disco ball once when I dressed as Janice for a Muppet-themed costume party.

[locumtenens.livejournal.com]

Please tell me you have pictures of this!

Your icon!!! ♥

[annearchy.livejournal.com]

For the first time, I actually liked Michael a tiny bit more than David Cook. Yes, I'm on the DCook bandwagon, but damn, I like Michael too. I liked small David's song choice this week but he's boring me with his basic Clay Aikenness. Dude cannot rock, whereas the rockers, Michael and DCook, can tone it down and do ballads and blues.

Kristy must go, but IMO she made another crafty song choice. Syesha, as you said, should have stuck with Dolly's version of IWALY. I think either Syesha or Ramiele will be out.

[jlh.livejournal.com]

The only thing I'm hoping is that Kristy will be gone by Idol Gives Back week, because my god, hearing her song of inspiration would be horrific. America did us proud last year, getting rid of Sanjaya in time, so I'm cautiously optimistic.

I'm watching season 2 on rewind now, as I didn't watch it at the time, and really, small David is like Clay? Is it the sincerity? Because Clay was nerdy but definitely had a man's voice, while small David has an amazing but essentially pop and youthful voice.

[annearchy.livejournal.com]

*shrugs* Small David strikes me as Clay-like; maybe it is the sincerity. Or maybe it's the pop-only arrangements? Dunno. I'd like to see small David tackle different sorts of songs, the Michael and DCook do. Somehow I suspect small David wouldn't be comfortable rockin' out :P

[friendsofjunius.livejournal.com]

one, what did Simon say to Michael? fracking DVR
and two, what about that wardrobe comment to Carly!! he's right, but WTF!!

[jlh.livejournal.com]

Not fracking DVR, fracking Idol—they ran WAY over. Simon said that it was the best he'd seen Michael in the entire competition. He loved it.

Simon's wardrobe comment = level 2 advice, when the song is good but the other stuff isn't working. Because he's right, when she isn't being some crazy rocker, she should wear long sleeves.

[ziggy1278.livejournal.com]

Okay I am now afraid that David A will win this competition based purely on the irrational teen girl vote. He's good, but he's not the best, and I am scared for the first time that he will win.

The winner should be either David Cook (who RULED tonight) or Brooke (who clearly has NO IDEA what it's like to beg someone not to take her man).

Ramiele go home. Please. Please. You're like a boil that simply will not go away. A pouty, baby talking, always with the pants too high boil.

[jlh.livejournal.com]

David Cook was great and I'm glad he has a fanbase, because he wasn't blow-you-away great and he was early in the show, and also his outfit was not hot. But the haircut is better and I'm glad he did his own arrangement tonight. I wish everyone would stop with the "that's not his arrangement" as both Blake and Daughtry have said that when they used other people's arrangements they'd always credit them but it would get edited out of the video.

For small David, it isn't just the irrational teen girl vote, though that's sizeable—it's also the adoring grandma vote. This is important because if small David turns impertinent, he won't keep that vote, which is what finally happened to Sanjaya, and the advantage small David had over Danny. I just don't know why you weren't afraid that small David would win before; as Jacob says, this year is basically a coronation of him as far as the show is concerned. It's always been his to lose.

I don't get how Brooke can be singing country and not be down with the heartbreak since country is so all about heartbreak. Come on, lady!

[lillijulianne.livejournal.com]

we pretty much agree on everything. also, hahahaha joe r.:

Simon is impressed that he made a song about sparrows seem compelling. Now you know I hate trying to delve into Simon's psyche, because that's a dark and winding hall of mirrors indeed, but that's twice in three weeks now that he's slammed songs with birds in the title. Please, please, PLEASE let Jason Castro sing that "Mock- YEAH! Ing - YEAH! Bird - YEAH!" song next week so we can see if this truly is an issue with him.

seriously, did alfred hitchcock send him a bird in a coffin or something? it's just weird.

[lillijulianne.livejournal.com]

however, i'm a little sick of people like joe, who should have more grace, jumping on the vftw "lonely housewives" bandwagon. first of all, as a housewife, i seem to be in the minority in these idol-boy fandoms; they're full of single career chicks and young girls.

second of all, while i realize he's talking in this particular case about excessively stalkerish fanmail, and i don't send fanmail, there's an overarching tone i object to, and it's this: no one calls married men "lonely" or other such things when they lust after starlets, models, centerfolds, and no one pities or mocks, say, jessica alba because so many of her fans are old enough to be her father. it's only male showbiz figures who are supposed to be horrified that anyone but young hotties is a fan.

eh. my grandfather used to tell my grandmother "hurry, magnum is on!" because he knew she loved tom selleck. my husband and i are always alerting each other to our tv crushes. it's part of normal life. deal.

[jlh.livejournal.com]

Plenty of people mocked all the old guys who were counting the days until the Olson twins were legal. I mean, the housewives thing is an old trope mostly because the sexuality of older women is dangerous because it doesn't lead to children but is also active and the culture has no place to put it. The culture has ways of saving Jessica Alba (at least most of the time). It's a whole THING. Which makes the cougars thing even more interesting.

[lillijulianne.livejournal.com]

Plenty of people mocked all the old guys who were counting the days until the Olson twins were legal.
true, but that's an extreme. i mean, i mock grown women who lust after small david, and i'd put the olsens in that category. but the guys we're talking about here are grown, and they've put themselves on the most-watched show on TV and they don't need to be protected from, horrors, less than gorgeous women posting "hey, jason castro or whoever is hot."

and the cougars thing in a way is actually worse, to me, because it's always implied and often stated that cougars are in contrast to "fraus." just think about what the last three letters in MILF stand for, and what that means when some vftw loser is congratulating dcook for being pursued by same or shuddering in horror on his behalf when the women don't qualify. at least when it was older women's sexuality, period, that was suspect, it was more about roles. does that make sense?

[lillijulianne.livejournal.com]

and i shouldn't have used the word pursued, because that mucks up my meaning. substitute liked, swooned over, whatever makes clear that all we're talking about is expressing attraction to someone on TV, not grabbing him or trying to get into his apartment.

[jlh.livejournal.com]

I think that older women liking these boys gets the same level of ridicule that young girls liking them does—girls liking boys, fangirling boys, is always made ridiculous, because that's the only place for it, the ridiculous, the almost-hysterical, the expression-of-hormones-that-have-no-outlet, be you a young girl or a spinster or a desexed housewife. Even if you're in the perfect age/look/etc, you're still supposed to be an object, not a subject, so anything else is ridiculous. If the postcard sender had been 15, they would have giggled at her cuteness, but it would have been the same dismissal.

In the meantime, have some Sarsgaard.

[sistermagpie.livejournal.com]

Damn I wish I'd have seen this ep. (Or gone to the trouble of taping it, but it's too much of a pain!)

Kristy is just desperate with her song choices. Coat of Many Colors? Oh yeah.

It's a funny thing about Brooke because she seems to have the gift of being able to put emotion into a song to the point where she puts over songs well even while getting the emotion wrong.

Do you think she's been sort of trained to just smile when she sings, because singing is enjoyable or you're supposed to smile onstage, even when she picks and sings songs that are totally in conflict with smiling? Because her voice doesn't sound shallow when she sings, you know? Like when Ramiele sings "In My Life" I get that she's not able to understand the song at all. Brooke manages to sound more mature and like there's something there, even while her face says "I learned this song phoenetically!" But like I said, I didn't see it so I don't know how this one came across.

[jlh.livejournal.com]

The smiling could be how Brooke deals with nervousness, too. As she often smiles while talking to Simon in a nervous sort of way. Kristy was also wearing a maxi print dress and barefoot with a French pedicure noticed by Ryan that she did herself.

It would have been good to see if only because Michael was finally really good, and small David was also quite good.