I actually don't feel like you're telling me to just not let it bother me, I mean, at least, you aren't just saying I shouldn't let it bother me, but saying, well, here are the limits of what's going on, which is different. And you're so right that there's being a person who questions yourself vs being a person who doesn't, and I often get blown sideways by people who don't because I forget that it isn't just that they feel strongly about this thing, but that they don't question themselves. They are vehement people.
Which also means, yes, my tendency to think "well, they care a lot about this and I don't care quite as much so they must be right" isn't the best guideline. Maybe they do care a lot, but their wanting to shame people for a thing that I personally don't think is such a bad thing doesn't mean that I have to knuckle under to them. In the comment below from/to Edith I was reminded of that dustup last year between some of the social justice folks and Astolat over her Kradam Regency AU being ahistorical in that it talked about the British Empire but at the same time had Anoop as a major character somewhat unproblematically. They felt it erased the real history of race and power that underlies the Regency era; Astolat said she was writing a romance genre fic. Perhaps this could have been avoided if Astolat had labeled her fic as such, making it clear that the story was ahistorical in the manner of a modern-day genre regency romance, but she assumed people knew what she was doing, and unfortunately some folks read it thinking it would be a properly researched historical AU, which of course it wasn't. And so there was a certain amount of wank and I, as someone who'd recently written a historical AU where I did try to deal with the issues of race, got incredibly freaked out because in order to write a story you have to change some stuff, especially if you're writing an Idol historical AU. The great thing about the show is its racial diversity, but put them back in time and you either end up with a group of people who never would have met each other (you know, like that great essay about how if Buffy were set in the UK she and the Scoobies would never have met because they all would have gone to different schools) or an extreme power differential that makes fics uncomfortable. And you either are okay with historical fiction doing a certain amount of changes, or you're not. These people obviously were not. And what I wanted to say to them was, jesus, I'm an actual historian and I don't apply the standards of academic history to any fiction. It's absurd. That said, you should probably show your work.
But I think if I show my work, then I just have to be okay, and people who don't like it can avoid me. Of course I'd rather that people I actually know and respect don't think I'm homophobic, but if they decide I'm generally homophobic because of this one issue, however strongly they feel about it and however much I agree with them generally, then I guess I really can't worry about it. You know, if other people can't see the shades of gray I can see, even after I point them out, then there's nothing more to be said.
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Which also means, yes, my tendency to think "well, they care a lot about this and I don't care quite as much so they must be right" isn't the best guideline. Maybe they do care a lot, but their wanting to shame people for a thing that I personally don't think is such a bad thing doesn't mean that I have to knuckle under to them. In the comment below from/to Edith I was reminded of that dustup last year between some of the social justice folks and Astolat over her Kradam Regency AU being ahistorical in that it talked about the British Empire but at the same time had Anoop as a major character somewhat unproblematically. They felt it erased the real history of race and power that underlies the Regency era; Astolat said she was writing a romance genre fic. Perhaps this could have been avoided if Astolat had labeled her fic as such, making it clear that the story was ahistorical in the manner of a modern-day genre regency romance, but she assumed people knew what she was doing, and unfortunately some folks read it thinking it would be a properly researched historical AU, which of course it wasn't. And so there was a certain amount of wank and I, as someone who'd recently written a historical AU where I did try to deal with the issues of race, got incredibly freaked out because in order to write a story you have to change some stuff, especially if you're writing an Idol historical AU. The great thing about the show is its racial diversity, but put them back in time and you either end up with a group of people who never would have met each other (you know, like that great essay about how if Buffy were set in the UK she and the Scoobies would never have met because they all would have gone to different schools) or an extreme power differential that makes fics uncomfortable. And you either are okay with historical fiction doing a certain amount of changes, or you're not. These people obviously were not. And what I wanted to say to them was, jesus, I'm an actual historian and I don't apply the standards of academic history to any fiction. It's absurd. That said, you should probably show your work.
But I think if I show my work, then I just have to be okay, and people who don't like it can avoid me. Of course I'd rather that people I actually know and respect don't think I'm homophobic, but if they decide I'm generally homophobic because of this one issue, however strongly they feel about it and however much I agree with them generally, then I guess I really can't worry about it. You know, if other people can't see the shades of gray I can see, even after I point them out, then there's nothing more to be said.